How We Help Our Clients

When I first joined EOLCCA’s Board of Directors, I decided to go through the volunteer training so I could get a handle on our core work: to help Californians learn about their legal end-of-life options, and to help facilitate their choices. The training was excellent. Afterwards, I spent several blocks of time  being “on call” – to answer initial questions and give people the resources and guidance they requested. I told my colleagues I would probably never “attend” a death because I had not done it before, and I wasn’t sure I was emotionally prepared. I did leave one small loophole: I would do so if other volunteers were not available and our client was ready to take the medication.

Severe pain

Well, that day came! We got a call from Kaiser Permanente’s End of Life Options Program with information about a patient who qualified for medical aid in dying and he wanted to take the medication as soon as it was delivered. Billy (the name I will give him) had cancer with metastases to his bones and brain. He was in severe pain. The medication was on order. He  lived alone and his only brother lives on the east coast. The Kaiser EOL coordinator asked if  EOLCCA volunteers were available to help him through the process.

Since most of our local volunteers were busy with other clients, I agreed to do it, with the understanding that a more experienced volunteer would be available to help me on the day Billy planned to take his medication. I was assured that would happen, since EOLCCA’s practice is to always have two volunteers attend a death together. 

Relieved and… grateful

I visited Billy a few days before he planned to take the medication. As someone who would be at his bedside on the day he takes the medication, I wanted to get to know him a bit, and I wanted him to feel comfortable with me. He gave me a short synopsis of his life. Since we were both avid readers, we exchanged information about our favorite authors. I also reminded him that at any point in time, he could simply decide not to take the medication. He told me that if he had had the medication at that moment, he would take it. He had thought a lot about it, and he was ready. He was relieved and grateful that he lived in a state where medical aid in dying is legal.

Still sure

On the day of the planned death, an experienced volunteer became available and we arrived in Billy’s room shortly after the Kaiser pharmacist hand-delivered the prescription. He had already explained the medication process to Billy. Billy took the anti-nausea medication, the first step in the medication protocol. We again reminded Billy that it was his choice to take the subsequent life-ending medication or not, but once he did, there was no turning back. He told us he was still sure of his decision.

volunteer at bedside
Having time for last goodbyes

Billy’s brother requested a final FaceTime visit with him to say good-bye, and Billy agreed. During that last conversation, Billy gave him some direction about his financial affairs, and asked about his nephew. His brother, somewhat stunned, told him how his nephew was doing and to just make sure he was as comfortable as possible. It was a tearful call, but an important one, and deeply appreciated by Billy’s brother.

After Billy took the final medication, he chatted with us, mostly about his love of books. After ten minutes, he fell into a deep sleep, and passed away peacefully in about an hour with the two of us by his side.

At the end of the day, I felt honored to have had the privilege to support Billy in his choice to use medical aid in dying, and to witness his passing. From the first phone call through the day of Billy’s death, we spent many hours on his case–and this is not unusual. I was also fortunate to participate in the very core of the work we do at EOLCCA: to help our terminally-ill clients find relief from their suffering, and achieve the peaceful, dignified death they want.

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Stewart Florsheim serves on the Board of Directors of End of Life Choices California and chairs its Outreach and Education Committee. He has been an activist and leader in the end-of-life choice movement in California since 2003. During that time he was deeply involved in the effort to successfully pass the California End of Life Option Act in 2015. Stewart has given many presentations on end-of-life choice, including on radio and TV. 

EOLCCA supports a strong team of experienced volunteers throughout the state, ready to help anyone, anywhere in California free of charge with information and support regarding all end-of-life planning and choices, including aid in dying through the California End of Life Option Act. You can find comprehensive information on our user-friendly website. To support our work, or request an educational presentation, please visit ways to help.  Thank you.

Lavender Seniors of the East Bay

Facing Difficult “End of Life” Decisions

Many of us have watched our parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, other family members and friends face difficult “end of life” decisions. Some of them have experienced protracted bouts of illness (e.g., Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, Cancer, Stroke, Heart, Kidney or Liver Disease); others have had a sudden death while shoveling snow or a peaceful death in their sleep. And there are examples of everything in between. Though we may know intellectually that all of us will pass on one day, none of us knows how or when. Californians approaching the end of life – no matter how old they are – now have some options to consider.

In 2016, California followed the lead of its progressive neighbor to the north and passed the End of Life Options Act, effective June 9th that year, making it the fifth state in the country to adopt such legislation. There are now 11 states and jurisdictions in the U.S. that support medical aid in dying. This Act was renewed and enhanced earlier this year. Knowing what options might be available through this Act – including the potential for medically-assisted death – may be worth learning about. The Act empowers a person to choose a death with dignity.

For the Third Friday Lunch Bunch on 19th August, we will have a well-versed team of experts on this subject making a presentation to us after our check-ins.

  • Stewart Florsheim, Board Member, End of Life Choices California
  • Ann Gordon, Practice Leader, End of Life Option Program, Kaiser Permanente, NCal

They will help us answer at least the following questions, plus be available for a robust Q&A session after their presentation.

  • What does the act cover and how has it changed this year?
  • What are the other legal options available in California at the end of life?

For more Information, please contact:  Dr. John David Dupree, Secretary at JohnDavid@LavenderSeniors.org

Wise Aging: End-of-Life Choice in California, Family Stories session 2

This event meets Sunday, July 10, 2022  • 11 Tammuz 5782 at 1:00 PM – 2:30 PM Zoom. This is the second session addressing end-of-life choices. In the first session, we covered the details about end-of-life choice, along with the Reform Jewish perspective. In this session, we plan to have a discussion including family members and friends who have been involved in implementing the decision.

Join this gathering live via Zoom Or dial in by phone to: (669) 900-9128
Meeting ID: 814 0702 0804

For more information, please contact Stewart Florsheim.

Temple Sinai Oakland

End-of-Life Choice in California: The Options and the Jewish Perspective
California enacted the End of Life Option Act in 2016 and it was renewed–and enhanced–in 2022.
  • Do you know what the act covers and how it changed?
  • Are you familiar with the other legal options that are available to you at the end of life?
  • Do you know the Jewish perspective on end-of-life choice?
Please join us for a conversation about end-of-life choice in California. The presenters, all affiliated with Temple Sinai in Oakland, are:
  • Rabbi Andrea Berlin, Temple Sinai
  • Stewart Florsheim, Board Member, End of Life Choice California
  • Ann Gordon, Manager, End of Life Option Program, Kaiser Permanente, NCAL
The event will take place on Sunday, April 24, at 1pm. Here is a link to the registration form.