Medical aid in dying is a sensitive and personal topic. While I am not currently facing a terminal condition, I take comfort in knowing medical aid in dying would be available if I needed it in the future. Some of you may be in a similar situation. However, others of you may be nearing the end of life with a life expectancy of less than six months.  

If you qualify for the ELOA, these are crucial first steps:

Be specific when talking with your doctor.  

While prescribing aid in dying is legal in California, not all doctors choose to participate. So it’s necessary to confirm whether your doctor supports medical aid in dying. A direct and concise question like: “Will you prescribe medical aid in dying for me using California’s End of Life Option Act?” makes your request unambiguous. You may also choose to first acknowledge all that your doctor has done to extend your life, using a statement like: “I appreciate all the support you’ve given me; yet I’ve made peace with understanding my death is nearing and need to ask one more thing of you . . .” 

Ensure your request is documented in your medical record.

Communicating your request to receive aid in dying is a key requirement of the ELOA. So even if your doctor declines to prescribe such aid, following up with an ask that your request be written down and noted is recommended. (A recent court challenge to the ELOA removed the requirement for doctors to document the request.) If your doctor declines and does not offer a referral, you may reach out to End of Life Choices California and a volunteer can direct you to nearby providers known to support aid in dying. When your doctor accepts your request, and documents it, there’s often an opportunity for a heartfelt conversation about what this means for you. 

For those of you who would want access to medical aid in dying if needed in the future, firstly, ensure you have completed an Advance Directive. In addition, talking with your doctor to express your wishes remains key. 

These are important first steps: 

* Schedule a doctor’s appointment specifically for an end-of-life planning discussion.

Physicians often get behind schedule and can seem rushed. Thus getting an appointment just for an end-of-life planning discussion is a good strategy. When scheduling, you can specify your planned topic, or simply make it a general check-in. (If you use Medicare, your doctor will be reimbursed specifically for an end-of-life planning discussion.) 

* Avoid generalities and use specific language.

Relaying your awareness and understanding of California’s ELOA is a great way to start the conversation. Then staying focused with a direct question like: “If I ever had a terminal diagnosis and was eligible for medical aid in dying, and I asked you to prescribe the medication for me, would you do so?” will bring clarity. 

Being direct about a sensitive and personal topic like aid in dying can be intimidating. But the more clearly you express yourself, the more likely your doctor is to really “hear you” and understand not only your request, but also your priorities and values. 

Refer to this material on our website for additional information about the ELOA and medical aid in dying or call and ask for a volunteer to assist you.       

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Becky Oliver is a volunteer with EOLCCA.  Her professional life has been spent as part of Silicon Valley’s tech industry.  Outside of work, her personal passions include contributing to end-of-life causes, with a specific interest in the nature of care for the aging and those nearing end of life.